Have you ever had a situation when your coaching conversation did not go in the direction you expected or planned for?
Sometimes our coaching conversations take an unexpected turn.
This can be really challenging because we know that it’s important for our coaching partners to take the lead in directing the conversation.
But what happens when…
- it seems like your coaching partner is straying away from the goals you set at the beginning of the cycle or your work together? Or
- when you notice something during a classroom visit that you are hoping will attract the attention of your coaching partner, but it doesn’t? Or
- You realize there is a gap that needs to be addressed that your coaching partner doesn’t realize yet?
It can be tricky to know if you should find a way to address these issues and potentially redirect the conversation – let alone actually try to do it!
This episode is inspired by conversations we’re having in our global cohorts of The Coach Certificate and Mentorship Program and Getting Started as an Instructional Coach. When we hear common questions come up in our global cohort calls, we know they’re a great topic for a QuickTips episode!
If you have a question like this that’s been bugging you, send me a DM on Instagram and we’ll do our best to answer here.
What’s YOUR level of coaching mastery?
All coaches go through various stages of coaching mastery. Once you identify where you’re at, you can begin to build the skills needed to move to the next stage.
This quiz is based on real-life case studies compiled from years of working with coaches inside The Coach Certificate & Mentorship Program!
When you receive your results, you’ll also get your matching case study from the STRIVE Case Studies to see where you fit in the stages of coaching mastery.
Ready to tackle your challenges and move on to the next level in YOUR coaching practice?
The STRIVE Model of Coaching Mastery quiz will help you identify your level of coaching mastery by matching you with case studies compiled from years of working with coaches inside The Coach Certificate & Mentorship Program so you can easily see where you fit!
When you complete the quiz, you’ll get:
- Your matching case study,
- Specific strengths & challenges aligned to your result;
- Suggested next steps for each stage;
Plus the Case Study Document includes:
- Case studies leveled by coaching mastery;
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You’ll go straight to the Quiz, and get the Case Studies by email.
5 Tips for Redirecting a Coaching Conversation
You will need to gauge when you need to follow your colleague’s thinking and if you need to step in and redirect. Part of active listening is to identify when the conversation drifts in a different direction. You can prepare for this before your coaching conversations and address it during them as well.
Here are five tips for those times….
1: Set expectations about the coaching relationship with your coaching partner
Anticipate that there could be misunderstandings or the need to change or adjust goals and be open about how you can both address that. Acknowledge that you both go into this coaching relationship with positive intentions, it can be helpful to have a plan for when perspectives or priorities may not align.
2: Have a structured goal setting process in place can help clarify goals and provide a point of reference.
Having a process to document goals and meeting notes provides a ‘3rd-point’ when needing to re-focus a coaching conversation. When it seems that the teacher is taking the conversation in a different direction, you can refer to the goal that has been set and ask the teacher to help you make connections to their goal. Perhaps you need more clarity in understanding what the teacher is thinking.
3: Take an inquiry stance to explore why the teacher has chosen the direction they have.
Ask questions and paraphrase what you’ve been hearing to help clarify what the teacher is addressing. This can help bring the conversation back to the central issue without redirecting. Or it may reveal an underlying concern the teacher has about the current goal. Being curious about their train of thought shows your respect for their ideas, thinking, and feelings. In some cases, just giving them the space and time to express themselves will then provide you the opportunity to refocus the conversation.
4: Be flexible about how you proceed.
Sometimes, seemingly unrelated topics can lead to valuable insights, so be open to exploring connections when appropriate. Additionally, you may find that your coaching partner is stuck or distracted and needs to take a couple steps back before moving forward.
5: Reiterate the relevance and importance of their goals and the progress they’ve made.
This positive reinforcement can encourage them to realign with the focus of the conversation, especially if they have taken the conversation in a negative or cynical direction. This can help re-center their focus on their goal by acknowledging their concerns but also providing an opportunity to consider constructive and practical steps forward.
Even when we do our best to plan for a coaching conversation, there are a variety of situations that can impact how and where that conversation goes once we are in it. As Simon Sinek points out, “Always plan for the fact that no plan ever goes according to plan.”
As instructional coaches we can minimize the challenges for those times that our perspectives or direction do not align with our coaching partner by having clear expectations and boundaries, being curious and flexible in our approach, and encouraging our colleagues to see the benefit and growth in the goals they have set.
Ultimately, with a clear understanding of the role of instructional coaches, our colleagues will understand that our strategies for facilitating their thinking sometimes involve a little nudge or a few questions to help them see through the challenges and distractions and focus on accomplishing their goals.
The power is in the listening: Listening with genuine curiosity is one of the most important skills a coach can develop.
When we listen with genuine curiosity we allow ourselves to see through the eyes of our coaching partner. We are able to understand where they’ve been, how they reached this point, and why they’re thinking what they’re thinking right now.
This is the (not so secret) recipe to being able to ask the next “just right” question – and to uncover if the conversation really does need to be redirected (or not).
If this idea resonates with you, we have a couple of other episodes that you will love!
- Coaching Case Study: The Power of Intentionally Slowing Down Coaching Conversations with Sasha Robins [Ep 238] – coachbetter.tv
- My “Secret” Coaching Assessment – coachbetter.tv
- One Question That Will Transform Your Coaching Practice – coachbetter.tv
And if you want to see this kind of conversation in action, check out this recent live coaching call where Kim is coaching one of her amazing clients, Vicki Heupell
You’ll be able to see Kim, in action, using quite a few of these strategies!
In all of these episodes, including today’s, you can see that the challenge is ensuring you’re able to slow down and allow yourself to listen with genuine curiosity!
If this is something you are building in your coaching practice, come join us in one of our courses for coaches!
We include intentional time to reflect on your current coaching capacity, so you can build the next set of your coaching skills – at the level that’s right for your experience.
Each of our three global cohorts will help you take the next step in your coaching practice – either as a brand new or aspiring coach in Getting Started as an Instructional Coach, or as a current coach or educator ready to build a thriving coaching program in The Coach Certificate and Mentorship Program, or as a coach who’s ready to lead in Coaches as Leaders.
Find all the details about all of our courses for coaches at coachbetter.tv/learn and select the course that’s just right for your current experience level.
Global cohorts open once a year.
Find all the details for each course at coachbetter.tv/learn
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Free Workshops for Instructional Coaches
If you’re ready to keep learning, try one of our FREE workshops where you’ll be able to dig deeper into the concepts in this post, and get a peek at all of our courses for coaches.
We have workshops (and courses) to support coaches at every stage of their career: from new and aspiring coaches making the move from classroom to coach; to current coaches ready to be more intentional and strategic in their practice; to established coaches leveraging their coaching experience to lead.
You can them all on our coachbetter website at coachbetter.tv/workshops
If you’re curious right now, you have questions, please reach out. You can leave a comment below, join our #coachbetter Facebook group, or find us on social media at Eduro Learning and send me a DM. I’d love to support you on your coaching journey. See you next time!
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